Cosmic Fantasy

~ COSMIC FANTASY ~

Laser Soft / Telenet

CD-ROM

1990

This is always the first game I recommend when people would like to get into Japanese RPGs but don't know the language and aren't sure where to start. The menus are easy to figure out; the quest is very straightforward (you go from to town to maze to town in strict, linear order; the world doesn't open up to you until you acquire a ship near the end of the adventure, but even then, it isn't difficult to figure out where to go); and you have to manage only two characters, Yuu and Saya (known as Cobra and Sayo, respectively, in US CF2). Other characters join your party, but they, uh, don't do anything.

Of course, CF's simplicity could be off-putting for those who have already experienced the intricate likes of the Tengai Makyous. Yuu's quest boils down to exploring dungeons and leveling up; there isn't much mystery or depth involved. If you don't mind the linearity of the adventure and the rudimentary gameplay, the only potentially irritating factor is the fact that after every battle you have to sit through approximately seven seconds of empty screen before play resumes. I got used to the delay after a while, but some folks may not be as tolerant of it.

As simple as the game is, there are plenty of positive things to note in its favor. As you'd expect from a CF episode, the story is a great blend of crazy humor...

...and quiet poignancy.

As you might also expect from a CF game, the soundtrack consists of only a few tunes. Most of them are chip numbers, but quite a few are very good (particularly the main maze track) and have an appealing old-school sound about them that veterans should enjoy. The in-game graphics are conspicuously primitive, but they certainly aren't revolting.

The cinemas don't even come close to matching the quality and theater of those in many later PCE RPGs, but they're nice in their own right and compare favorably with those in most other early CD games.

Skirmishes can be resolved quickly, and the encounter rate shouldn't prove irritating. For the most part, if you make sure to explore the labyrinths thoroughly, you'll earn enough experience that you won't even have to partake in perfunctory leveling-up exercises.

CF might not come off as an outstanding game when you break it down into its elements, but it does a lot of things pretty well, and it doesn't screw many things up. Tackling it will be a nice way to get your feet wet if you're thinking about getting into Japanese RPGs, and even those who are already pros should find it to be a quality addition to their adventure-game libraries.

Neutopia II

~ NEUTOPIA II ~

Hudson Soft / NEC
HuCard

1992

I liked Neutopia a lot when I was a kid, but recent revisits left me unimpressed. I was told by quite a few sources that Neutopia II is superior to the original, but sadly, that isn't the case. Improvements and additions here are modest: you can maneuver diagonally; you have a few more items to play around with; some of the dungeons have many more rooms than those in the first game (making matters feel even more repetitive... wonderful); and you get a couple of "fancy" visual effects, like gratuitous "swirly" nonsense at the beginning and wavy underwater stuff. Otherwise, this is the same crap as before.

Actually, I think the bosses in the first episode are much cooler than the boring jackasses here. The music is still generic chip fare (though I should note that if you love Super Star Soldier's soundtrack, which I don't, there's a very good chance you'll adore this one as well). Some tunes from the first game come jingling back for more, but I didn't care much for them to begin with. I did like the dungeon tune here at first, but it's very repetitive and quickly got on my nerves. And as far as gameplay goes, you get the same weak, archaic combat and the same kindergarten-level push-the-blocks-to-see-if-a-staircase-appears "puzzle solving."

Fans of the Neutopia games always claim that there's something to be said for simplicity. Sure there is. But I think there's a difference between appealing, well-designed simplicity and redundant, uninspired simplicity. Neutopia II repeatedly asks that you clear a room of enemies and push on each block in said room to see if anything "happens." You do this about seven thousand times during the brief adventure. There's nothing interesting or challenging or thought provoking about any of it. The puzzle solving never really goes beyond that, either. And since you don't get a great story or cool combat or even a good soundtrack to accompany the monotony, the whole experience falls flat.

For people who still adore the first Neutopia, this game will probably be lots of fun. If they don't mind the rudimentary design in that game, they should be satisfied here as well. If you are like me and don't view Neutopia as a "classic" but as little more than a decent, if outdated, action-RPG, then I highly recommend you look for the cheapest deal possible on this sequel and avoid the relatively high-priced US version. I sure am glad I didn't spend much money on the game. Quite frankly, I think it sucks, and I got more and more annoyed with its suckiness as it went on.

Snow-land and underwater scenes add a little variety to the overworld experience...

...which is still largely routine Zelda-copy fare.

You get some new items to mess around with this time. Like a boomerang. Don't know how they ever thought of that one. The staves unleash mighty elemental attacks... that often cause your enemies to crash right into you.

Let's look at the wonderful Neutopia II "puzzle" design: Kill all the enemies and push on all the blocks...

...avoid the "boobytraps" and push on all the blocks...

...dodge the spinning razors and push on all the blocks...

...or just... push on all the blocks.

Among the bosses, only the kraken really stands out. Most of the others are kinda lame.

Rom Rom Stadium

~ ROM ROM STADIUM ~

NCS/Masaya

CD-ROM

1989

Rom Rom is plagued by problems that occur in many other old-school baseball games: there are way too many infield hits, as balls in play usually roll slowly and the players make very weak throws; the stupid computer-controlled infielders have the ridiculous tendency to throw to bases that are uncovered; and said infielders often chase slow ground balls into the outfield instead of just letting the outfielders charge and put an end to all the dashing about.

Again, these are issues that pop up in plenty of old baseball games, but Rom Rom sometimes takes them to extremes, leading to some really ridiculous happenings. Say the computer's first baseman and second baseman both go after a ground ball. The former picks it up and tosses it towards the first-base bag, where there's no one to catch it.

The throw sails right past the bag and bounces off the wall. The second baseman runs over and scoops up the ball while the first baseman runs towards the bag. The second baseman finally makes the throw to first, which somehow beats the runner there and produces an out. This absolutely absurd chain of events actually happens quite frequently.

Rom Rom's contests aren't particularly enjoyable even when such nonsense isn't going on. They play out in slow, dull fashion, unlike World Class Baseball's exhilarating arcade-style affairs. RR is a little more challenging than WCB, however: I've won my share of 7-1 blowouts, but there have been none of the 29-0 massacres that often occur when I power up WCB, and it's actually possible to experience games during which neither team scores many runs. (Take that with a grain of salt, though, as I've been playing WCB regularly for many years, while RR isn't interesting or enjoyable enough to receive much play time from me.)

In any event, Rom Rom is an okay-but-not-great game of baseball that doesn't come close to WCB. Here are some of the (mostly insignificant) things that separate RR from most other members of the old-school-baseball-game crowd:

- Pitch counts are shown, and working the count to wear down the opposing team's pitcher can really pay off in some of the tougher Pennant mode games.

- The action occasionally switches over to scenes of some strange girl watching the games on TV. She puts on various weird outfits and cheers you on or bemoans your lack of success. Sometimes, she dons a baseball uniform of her own and jumps up and down; other times, she hurls her cat through her television monitor in frustration.

- Win enough games in Pennant mode and you'll get to face the mighty Masaya team in "Meka Stadium," an abominable ballpark with ridiculously bright colors that make witnessing the action an excruciating experience. Obviously, I'm not too fond of this F-Zero-style depiction of baseball.

- I didn't mess with it at all, but there's a Team Edit mode where you apparently can create and save your own club. This is about the only somewhat-decent reason for the game being on CD.

Nadia: The Secret of Blue Water

~ NADIA ~

Hudson Soft

Super CD-ROM

1993

I'm not familiar with the anime or manga or whatever the hell this is based on, but it captured my attention right away with a scene where a girl is about to blow her own brains out. Unfortunately, some lame Captain Gloval wannabe slapped the pistol from her hands; and my hopes for gratuitous gore were dashed just like that.

From there on out, the story concentrates on a girl named Nadia and her group of pals as they stumble around an island and take on some weird mask-wearing villains who call themselves things like "Gargoyle" and "Goblin." Actually, for the most part, the spotlight is placed on Nadia's nerdy sidekick Jean and a turncoat blonde, with a disturbing youngster reminiscent of Robotech's Annie thrown in for good measure.

Graphically, this is one of the most impressive PCE digital comics. You can tell that a lot of effort went into these drawings, and the scenes are constantly switching up, so you won't find yourself in situations where you're staring at a single image as the characters babble on and on. There's also plenty of voice acting to accompany the impressive and ever-proceeding slide show. But the music, while effective in setting moods for most scenes, is forgettable.

Sadly, the story is just as forgettable as the soundtrack. There's plenty of buildup, but the conflict resolutions are almost always anticlimactic. I understand that the core material isn't supposed to deliver the kinds of thrills you can get from 3x3 Eyes or Snatcher, but I still would've liked more excitement. Ranma 1/2 2 provides great anime-style entertainment without resorting to anything particularly "mature" thematically. Nadia's plot twists are moderate and predictable, save perhaps for the emergence of a monstrous something-or-other that starts wrecking shit late in the game.

Still, the visuals do their best to save the day, and they do indeed make the game worth playing through. There are a couple of other minor caveats to note, though. You can save only at certain predetermined points, not whenever you want. This isn't a particularly big deal since the save breaks occur regularly enough and there aren't any Game Overs (that I experienced, at least), but still, it's nice to be able to walk away from a comic at any time. Also, while I got my copy nice and cheap, the game often seems to sell for about twenty bucks, which is a little high for a rather common (and unspectacular) comic.

Neutopia

~ NEUTOPIA ~

Hudson Soft / NEC

HuCard

1990

This was no mere case of complimentary emulation or innocuous mimicking. With Neutopia, Hudson pulled off one of the most blatant and egregious acts of conceptual appropriation in the history of gaming. Of course, being that the patterned-after object is an undeniable classic and that the copycats did their work quite well, Turbo players have never felt any need to decry the remarkably conspicuous theft. I myself liked The Legend of Zelda a whole lot when I was a kid, so I certainly had no gripes with being served an additional helping of vast overworld and spooky labyrinths.

Well, after many, many years and a couple of recent playthroughs, I still like Neutopia, but my experiences with it back in the day were much more enjoyable, and I'm afraid I must presently downgrade it from "great" to merely "pleasant." Mechanically, this one-screen-at-a-time adventure game seems obsolete compared to Crystalis for the NES, let alone the many mighty action-RPGs that were eventually released for the Duo. There are very few true secrets and puzzles to speak of. Practically all of the "secret spots" are marked, and the "puzzles" largely consist of pushing every block in every room. It's still pretty fun to explore the environments and hack things up, especially since the graphics are quite nice and the controls are adequate (if rudimentary). However, when considering not only the superior 16-bit action-RPGs that were released subsequent to Neutopia's prime but also the mighty Alundra--which took basic ideas from Zelda and augmented them with an amazing story, brain-busting puzzles, and refined controls--well, Neutopia starts to seem a bit lacking.

Neutopia imitates Zelda well as far as basic gameplay aspects go, but it can't match the elements that make Zelda truly special. As primitive as it is, Zelda is incredibly atmospheric, thanks in large part to its eternally memorable soundtrack. Exploring its overworld feels like a grand, epic experience. Navigating its labyrinths is eerie and suspenseful. The enemies are interesting and oftentimes powerful. And playing it now produces a sweet bit of nostalgia thanks to those qualities. Neutopia, on the other hand, has never felt like anything more than a short, cartoony adventure. And now, there's no nostalgia. No atmosphere. No tunes that stay with me after I turn the game off. No brutal enemies that could stand up to the Darknuts of Zelda fame. Just decent, appealing questing.

I don't want to sound too negative; Neutopia is still fun, and there isn't a single moment during the adventure when I'm not enjoying myself to an extent. But sadly, the game simply hasn't aged all that well.

Exploring the overworld while battling cartoony fiends is a pleasant-enough activity...

...but uncovering the land's ill-concealed "secrets" isn't hard enough to be rewarding.

Similarly, circumventing the underworld's "defense systems" is seldom difficult.

When you're not avoiding (obvious) traps and pushing blocks, you'll be "brawling" with small Zelda-foe rip-offs.

Actually, Zelda gives you more neat stuff to mess around with.

And Ganon doesn't waste any time babbling in cliche.

I do give Neutopia credit for its cool cartoony bosses... though, like most other aspects of the game, they seemed larger and cooler back when I was a kid.